My Story : Sister Mary Judith Fleig

“You have not chosen me, I have chosen you.” (Jn. 15:16 )

These words from Scripture continue to amaze me almost everyday of my life, that God has chosen ME! My call to this Benedictine community was nurtured by many special people. My loving parents told their children, that they would not stand in our way; whatever way of life we chose, they would support us. Also, Sister Madeline, my sixth grade teacher, influenced me at a very young age. In the spring, I helped her on the grotto hill. Of course, she would have to tell me many times what was a weed and what was a flower! She was such a positive and encouraging nun.

In my senior year, I dreamt of being a missionary. Little did I know that by joining this Benedictine community, that dream would be fulfilled. I think that at the age of 18, I did not have the courage to join a missionary community and go to a foreign country. But God did have plans for me. At that time, Sisters Mary Carmen and Mary Dominic talked to me about the Benedictine life. I feel that their gentle nudging and their witness of joy and dedication helped me to say “yes” to this community and the Benedictine way of life. I thank God daily for the call!

My love and understanding of the Benedictine charism and the monastic life deepened when the Guatemalan community made the decision to accept native vocations. In so many ways, we learned together because we were a very young community. Many, many times we had to ask ourselves “what does it mean to be Benedictine in the Guatemalan culture?” The experience brought many joys, but also many heartaches. The Guatemalan people really taught me what hospitality means. Whenever I visited a home, the family would stop their work and want to sit and chat. And of course, they offered whatever they had to offer, usually a cup of coffee and a tayuyo or bread. The Guatemalans lived the saying “mi casa es su casa.” (My house is your house.) God is all around this community!

I see God in the little acts of kindness of the Sisters. I sense God in the words of wisdom of Sister Kris. God is present when someone says to me “have a good day.” I hear God in the words of the sister who asks me about the people for whom I translate in the courts. I cherish the common table, perhaps because I am not able to be present at every meal because of my ministry. But just to share a meal and talk about the important and not-so-important things in our lives is very meaningful to me — I know God is at the table with us. God is present is the sister who asks me when I come home exhausted and tired “how was your day?”

For me a highlight of our daily living is the Liturgy. Without it, I could not survive. The Liturgy of the Hours and the Eucharist are my food that sustains me. I feel that we have much to offer the Church and the world through our well-planned and meaningful liturgies. Through our liturgies, we hold the whole world (the poor, sick, immigrants, families, friends, all who have asked our prayers) in our hands offering them to our loving God. I find God in the routine and not-so-routine of each day. I find God in the defendant who is concerned about what is going to happen to him or her. I find God in the beautiful dark brown eyes of 5-year-old Melissa. I find God in my coworkers as we discern together what we should do for the good of the Hispanic community.

For me, one of the biggest challenges is how to answer the demands of my ministry, and find time for community and private prayer. And we, Benedictines of Ferdinand, will have a future, if we continue to have discerning hearts and live our charism in the 21st century. And this could mean “go where we don’t want to go.” We need to risk and respond to the cry of the poor and needy.